Sanity
by PissyPoet
Summary: She came back changed. Hollow. Jaded. It's just that no one noticed..At least not right away
1. Prologue

Prologue

"Itsy bitsy spider crawled up the water spout, down came the rain and washed the spider out, up came the sun and dried up all the rain, itsy bitsy spider went up the spout again," Today was her first day back from her fourth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Ginerva Weasley laid in her bed tightly holding onto herself, singing nursery rhymes quietly.

It was quite a funny picture actually, the girl everyone thought was perfectly fine lay in her bed, broken, and desperate. Harry Potter had saved her life; he hadn't saved her innocence. After everything that had happened this year she was dead; a limp doll that no one would bring back to life. Sirius had been her confidant, he was the only one who knew what Tom had done, what he had taken. It's sad though, she has to say that he _was. _

Forever would she be scarred, dreaming the same nightmares, feeling the same pain, knowing it had happened and it wouldn't change, just like some thing that were taken would never come back.

§§§


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

I rolled over onto my back. My red hair spilling over my pristine white pillow, looking like a waterfall. I know all of this because of the mirror I had above my bed. Just like I know that there were tears spilling from my eyes. I kept staring though, the tears going unchecked.

I don't think I can handle it. It had been a while since it happened and it still burned me to see who I was. Who I wasn't.

No longer was I Ginny the innocent little girl who had a crush on Harry Potter. I was this Ginny, the one who was lost and hated the people who didn't save her. Harry Potter was to busy with his own problems, which inadvertently were because of the things she had done. Her brothers ignored her, they didn't care because she was bad for her reputation. Well Percy didn't ignore her, at least not until Penelope came along.

Before she had left Professor Dumbledore had given her the choice of going to America. He said she would go to America when ever she gave him the say so and than go to a muggle school anywhere in America . Well he hadn't said I would be going to America, he gave me the choice of which country I wanted to go to, I chose America. I think he knew how close to Sirius I was and how much his death hurt me.

Making up my mind to write him tomorrow and tell him I was accepting his offer, I rolled to my side again and stared at my wall.

§§§

Professor Dumbledore,

I am accepting your offer to go to any country I chose whenever I chose. I chose America. Los Angeles, California to be exact. My only problem seems to be that I don't have a place to stay, maybe you have already thought of this, if you haven't do you think I could stay with a normal family who knows of magic and go to regular school as you had said? I would like to leave a soon as possible, sir, I haven't told my family of this idea yet and I think if I did they would automatically say no. If it is not to much of a burden, do you think you could tell them? I'm going to start packing my bags because I know your mind and connections work fast.

I thank you sir,

Ginny Weasley

§§§

Albus Dumbledore sighed as he finished reading young Ginny's letter. He knew that Sirius' death had hurt her as much, if not more, as it did Harry. He may be old, and not as quick in the mind as he was when he was younger but he still knew that something had happened to young Ginny in the Chamber that no one knew about and no matter how much he hoped, and prayed that it wasn't what he thought it was, his gut told him it probably was. Making up his mind that he would not make the same mistake he had made with Harry, he started on writing two letters. One to an old student, now living as a muggle, and Mr., and Mrs. Weasley.

Little miss Weasley was strong, she just didn't know it yet.


	3. Chapter 2

"Ouch God damnit! You didn't tell me it would burn," A young girl was basically dancing around the room as she rubbed her nose. "God damn drugged up sonofabitch couldn't take the time to tell me it would burn." She turned on a young girl of about 17 and glared for a minute before sitting back down and picking up what looked to be half of an ICEE straw. She looked up and grinned.

"I wanna do it again Cay!" Cay, the companion, grinned back and picked up her straw with perfectly painted blood red nails.

As you could guess the other girl was me. Ginny Weasley.

I was sitting here with my best friend who was four years older than me, snorting up cocaine. Things had most definitely changed for me. Well at least, to put it short, this wasn't the first time I'd tried drugs. Just not this particular drug as you can guess from my earlier spaz fest.

"Come on Ginny hurry up and finish your line, we need to get to work." Dropping my straw I jumped up and started pulling clothes out of the drawers frantically.

"Shit!" I wasn't really able to talk to much as I was to busy working on my clothes.

Okay black skirt, black corset, black boots, black fishnet stockings, black choker. Can you see a theme here? I was going to work at a club, Finesse to be exact. In fact the only things that weren't black were my lips and nails. Lips were blood red and my nails were, well bright green. Okay so sue me I was a semi-Goth who liked a little color!

Rubbing my nose a little I grabbed Cay's hand and dragged her out the door.

"Hunny, what the hell are you doing, we still have like five minutes to get gone!" I looked at her sheepishly and kept walking.

"Oh I get it you want to see your Irish lover boy! Ohhh Doyle! Ginny bell couldn't wait to see you!" I smacked the side of her head to snap her out of her impression of what she would do when we got to Finesse.

"Don't even think about it you bloody wanker." I had lost my accent a little and only used it when playing mad, or just being mad.

"Ouch and the accent comes out." An Irish accent interrupted our conversation. I turned around and jumped into Doyle's arms, I hadn't noticed that we had gotten to the club yet.

"Darling save it for inside," He was joking of course! Well I hope at least.

"Fine, fine," I sulked as we walked into the club. Cay and I walked behind the counter and started grinning at the male customers, getting their drinks, and just having fun!

Welcome to a day in the life of me.

§§§

What Ginny didn't know was that awaiting her at her temporary home was a note, telling her she was coming home. Tomorrow.

§§§

A/N So what did ya'll think? Horrible? Yeah I kinda figured. lol review please, constructive criticism welcome!


	4. Chapter 4

"Ow.".

The first time Ginny Weasley had been home in a year and this was how she was experiencing it.  
On her ass.

"Not exactly the way I wanted to say hello but hey, what can you do?"

Her mother, Molly, jumped up and gave her a giant hug. As much as it embarrassed Ginny to admit it, she missed those. She missed all of the innocence that came with her mother clinging to her frail form.

Ginny watched as her youngest brother, Ron, looked her up and down with an odd look in his eyes. It was just than that Ginny realized what she was wearing in front of her family. A crisp white uniform type shirt, unbuttoned slightly below her breast, and 'Catholic school girl' skirt, black boots, and gray a band put over her blood red hair.

Odd how out of place she felt in her usual clothes.

She didn't want to be here were her only thoughts as her family engulfed her in one giant hug.

"Ginny dear, rise and shine." Her mothers high pitched voice sounded through the door.

She could say something corny like, 'I'll rise, but I'm not gunna shine.' But that would bother her just a little too much.

So she settled for getting ready for her first real day home.

Tight dark blue jeans, a white Abercrombie shirt, white flip-flops, white hair band, and her Lovedrug jacket.

"Beastly," She said to herself as she looked in the mirror.

Her drug usage had become a bit apparent, but she was almost certain no one in the Wizarding World would think anything of it, hopefully at least.

Her cheeks were a bit hollow, her eyes a bit larger, her body a bit smaller, and her mind a little bit jaded.

A/n;;;;I'm not sure if I should continue this story, just give me some feedback and I'll see what I should do. 


End file.
